Spirit in the Material World

There are times when mind, body, and spirit are in synch and all feels right in the world. I have had the great fortune to experience this for some of the richest times in my life. Then there are those times, of which we are too familiar, when it all goes out of synch. I repeatedly feel as if I have hit a low ebb in the confluence of physical, mental, and spiritual, only to come out of it and find that it is repeated.

This is not to say that my life is in ruins and I am ready to jump off a cliff – if one existed in this area. Quite the opposite… this is a time of learning. When I carefully observe the living, functioning beings around me, when I listen to the voice within amidst the incessant chatter, there is a place I remember where I need to return.

Silence. Solutide. Two misunderstood words. Silence is not shutting oneself off; it is opening up to hear. Solitude is not loneliness, it is a place of great comfort where one can reflect and gain some clarity. I feel a strong need to “constructively waste time and detach from all the manufactured nothingness of our time and culture.” To contradict slightly, time spent in contemplation or prayer is never wasted time. The more I forget this, the more I grow out of synch.

I spent five years in a whirlwind of change – sometimes exhilarating, sometimes painful, but always full of life. The last three years have been a period of winding down and settling in. At first, I thought of this as a more mundane existence, but in reality, it is a more contemplative existence. This is the very thing I wanted. Now that I have opened my eyes, partially through the help of the good friend who is quoted above, I can pull myself out of the low ebb and to a new place. Things never seem to be the same as they were and maybe they should not be. I don’t think I want to find myself in that whirlwind again, however exciting it may have been.

For now, I just need to see clearly and listen quietly, moving about like a spirit in the material world. Only when mind, body, and spirit are one again, can I truly walk among the living; only then, can I aspire to be fully alive.

The Calm After The Calm

It is now a week since returning from vacation. David and I had a wonderful time and if you haven’t seen the pictures, check them out – to the right of the blog on my Flickr page. David actually has better pictures on his Facebook page, so if you have access to his page, check that out as well.

My return to work was… unusual. Usually, when I return to work from a vacation, I get irritated quickly and it proves to be a hellish week. Not this time. I felt brain-dead all week. It may be that I was actually relaxed and have become unfamiliar with the feeling. Lots got done, (although it is never enough), bills were paid, deposits made, employees were added to insurance policies, a new employee started, contact was made with a new IT company, lots of discussion on our company website, meetings were endured, a million questions were answered, toilets were repaired… you know, the usual stuff. But I took it all in stride nearly all week. Something shifted on Friday and a little bit of the tension started seeping through. I suppose I should be grateful for four relatively calm (that is, me being calm) days.

I imagine that after all of the elegant resort atmosphere, attentive staff, spa pampering, and amazing food, I should expect the mundane world to be a bit colorless. I am trying to add some color to my life by sinking my teeth into my music studio – a pleasant reminder that I have a life outside of work. It is progressing slowly, but it is getting there.

So here I am, struggling to put a few sentences together because the brain is still in a bit of a haze. Probably best that I stop here and start making some noise... I mean, music…

Cheers!